Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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