So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
they call him Oral-B. enough said
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Randomize