When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
My mom asked what the mark on my neck was - I told her I burned it with a straightener.
She believed that the monsterous hickey on your neck was a burn?
well, not really. but then i reminded her that my sister has yet to take that pregnancy test and she conviniently forgot about my hickey
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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