Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
