Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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