Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
