It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
MIDGETS
????
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Randomize
