The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
