it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Randomize
