I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
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