got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
