you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Randomize
