we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
