Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
We named our party play list daddy issues
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Randomize