I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
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