Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
