She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
