New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
Randomize
