She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
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