Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
