If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
