epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Ladies don't puke and tell
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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