Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
