My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Randomize