can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
