I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
