let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
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