brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
