somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
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