No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize