We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Randomize
