NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
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