Is it normal to miss your booty call?
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
