Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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