My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Your cock deserves a montage
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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