I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize
