so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
Randomize
