the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize
