Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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