Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
