she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Randomize