we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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