I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
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