the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Randomize
