I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize