I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
well most of my day revolves around power hour
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
