Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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