i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
