My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize
