does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Randomize